heads full of packing peanuts

Bland Tells All: A Very Special Edition of The Bachelor

Brace your fucking selves right now.

I’m serious.

This is going to stun your goddamn faces off.

Bland is in The Bachelor hizzouse getting ready to unload the contents of his meat brain to the very dyslexic Chris Harrison. I’m guessing Chris Harrison is dyslexic because he has trouble comprehending words like “dramatic” “tension” “exciting” “romantic journey” and “very special.”

I know you’re thinking Speaker7, wasn’t this fucking show on last night for two fucking hours? Like what the fuck, man?

Seriously.

But America has all these questions, Chris Harrison lies. And now is our chance to get our answers straight from Bland’s taint.

So what does Bland have to say about his bullshit romantic journey? What was so important that it required a whole extra hour of Bland’s blankness?

 

idiotWow.