fat pigs

The Good Ol’ Pricks Debate

I watched the entire GOP debate last night and while my stomach muscles are still strained from all the dry-heaving, I felt compelled to actually write a post to share the highlights.

There were so many good things happening—so, so many. So many fantastic visionaries on one stage, so many enthusiastic audience members cheering the worst things, so many witnesses to the demise of the American democratic system.

It’s really hard to pick a favorite moment, but that doesn’t mean we can’t try.

It began with a shot of the most popular candidate at the moment, Donald Trump. I believe his face truly represents the face of the Republican Party:


There was that special time when Trump was asked about his penchant for calling woman “fat pigs”, “slobs”, “disgusting animals” and “losers who don’t appreciate megalomaniacs with Easter-grass toupees and micropenises”:


Then there was that beautiful moment when the audience cheered wildly about Trump’s claim of referring to only one woman as a “fat pig”.


I also enjoyed when Trump gave “evidence” about his claim that Mexico only sends the criminals, drug dealers and rapists to this country:


Or the moment Trump said his solution to immigration was to build a wall and that he asked former Florida Gov. Jeb Bush to do it:


There was the time Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker made this face:


And then made this face:


And then opened his mouth and I finally understood the concept of the banality of evil:


Or that time when Sen. Marco Rubio was asked about his support of allowing abortions in cases of rape and incest, and looked like a deer in headlights and began voraciously back-pedaling without the assistance of a bottle of water:


Or the moment when the millionaire candidates tried to out-poor each other:


The time Mike Huckabee challenged the claim from the movie Hustle and Flow that “it’s hard out here for a pimp” and blamed pimps and prostitutes for social security’s budget problems:


The moment Ohio Gov. John Kasich used the “I have a gay friend” defense to deflect a question about same sex marriage:


The entire time Jeb Bush looked like an uncomfortable, sad man:


How about the fantastic Facebook questions?!?:



Or when Rand Paul challenged Trump’s “hair” to a fight:


When Trump asked the moderators if he could have one minute to squeeze out a fart:


Or when Ted Cruz broke into song:


Breathtaking, really. And we still have over a year until the general election!

Oh boy…the dry heaves are starting again.