Me Write Good

Now that I’m writing daily, I figured this was an opportune time to analyze who I am as a writer.

I am not doing this because I’m desperately looking for something to write about only three days into NaBloWriMo, but because….um…yeah, I can’t even finish this sentence.

Analyzing takes a lot of work and takes away from the time I should be watching my son while he sticks legos into the garbage disposal. Luckily there is a website that does it for me: I Write Like.

You likely have heard of this site because it became super popular three years ago–this is why this blog is on the cutting edge, according to a search I performed in AltaVista.

The basic premise is you paste some of your stuff into a comment box and presto! you are told you write like a great artist such as a Norman Mailer or Nicole Polizzi.

As an aside, to get a Normal Mailer reading, you just have to write hateful things about women. To get Nicole Polizzi, you take a dump right on your screen.

It seems to pretty spot-on. For instance, I typed in this chestnut:


And it spit back this analysis:


I doth agree!

But how am I writing right now? It seems less William Shakespeare and more:


Let’s put it to the test shall we…


And the results:


Twas a brillig observation.

Speaker7, aka William Shakespeare, will be writing a daily post this month as part of the Nano Pablona Team. But soft, what light through yonder window breaks? It is the East and Hugo is the sun. 


  1. I love that site. I too apparently have multiple author disorder.

    And you can do a whole series on things your son sticks places. If he is like my son at that age, you could possibly do a post a year until he turns 13.

      1. You’ve got plenty of material. And you can add to it a post on those whose mothers refused them Legos just so I wouldn’t hear her curse.

  2. I typed a few sentences and it told me I wrote like Dan Brown. Fully expect Anonymous to DDoS “I Write Like” in three, two, one…

    Dan Brown my ass.

    *Disclaimer: should their website actually go down, I had nothing to do with it. For reals. *cough cough*

  3. I got a bunch of authors I had never heard of but once I got Stephen King and I’ll stick with that. I guess it’s cause my writing is scary? I also got William Shakespeare once. I wonder what it would come up with if I put in one of my 50 shades recaps, or worse, the actual 50 Shades. I think anal explosion surely.

  4. When I first saw that sight I was curious about it and then I forgot about it. So I just tried it. I have never heard of this guy before • David Foster Wallace. He looks really familiar and we share a name. My Mother used her maiden name on my birth certificat which was, Foster. Hmmm….

  5. “Now my charms are all overthrown
    And what strength I have’s an anal explosiown
    Which is most faint; now it’s true
    It must be here confined by you”

    A somewhat liberal take on Shakespeare’s closing monologue from ‘The Tempest’…it just goes to show: you and Shakespeare have more in common than matches and lighters, laptops and notepads, cigarettes and cigars, etc….That ‘I write like’-site is brilliant. Thanks for sharing that!

  6. I recently did this analysis mostly out of hubris and it told me Stephen King. I was hoping it would say that I write like Goldfish, but it seems I was not among the answers. It is clearly incomplete.

  7. Copied paragraphs from my NaNoWriMo in and got Arthur Clark, Jane Austin and James Joyce. Is this some sort of random author generator? Oh, and apparently my cat deserves better photos. Spooky, as I don’t have a cat.

  8. Wow, you and fellow Speaker 7 writers write like Shakespeare, Steven King, Dan Brown, E. L. James (kinda/sorta) and my analysis says: “You write like the Zodiac serial killer.” I expect the police to be here momentarily.

  9. I put Chapter One of RED JENNY in, and got a comparison to J K Rowling; I put in Part the First of RAGING GAIL, and was told I was doing George Orwell!

    So if I typed out what I *really* thought of this hack-site, who wants to take bets on what I get…?

  10. I copy/pasted the text on top of the page “Check which famous writer you write like…” and let the site analyze itself. “I Write Like” is written like H. P. Lovecraft. I knew this site was just some fantasy crap. But then, apparently, my last post was written like Lovecraft, before that, I was Arthur Clarke, David Foster Wallace, James Joyce, Kurt Vonnegut, Ian Fleming, Stephen King, and Vladimir Nabokov. But I was consistently getting Cory Doctorow in half of the cases, so it’s possible the site is onto something.

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