I have a new post up at Canadica, the longest undefended blog in the world. I had meant to publish it Wednesday, but am still figuring out the mystery that is calendars.
Wow, they are amazing, aren’t they? With their dates and their days with the different dates instead of the same date like I thought so that’s why this was published on the wrong date.
Yes, I teach children.
Speaker7 
You’re still The Shit.
Thanks Madame,
Me feel little stoopid though. I come home and I’m like what’s all this fuss about Canadica?–and a-derp.
I’m going to get pregnant just so you can be their teacher one day.
That’s a better reason that “I got drunk”
Your children will learn so much at my feet. They will know how to recognize turdish behavior in humans and. . . um. . . yeah, that’s about it.
Don’t worry, Speaker7. The kids aren’t listening anyway.
That is actually true. I would be more effective if I appeared before them like the great wizard of Oz. Anything on a screen reigns supreme.
What grade do you teach? Do you teach Geography? Because that Canadica lesson would be so great and totally appropriate. Am also waiting for your clown competition post. No pressure.
How cool would it be if you pretended to teach from behind a screen for one day? Maybe you could even do shadow puppets! Any chance you’re a drama teacher?